Let’s talk about anger. It’s ugly… like really ugly, and it’s also a pretty common symptom of postpartum depression and anxiety.
Typically, when we talk and think about postpartum depression, we think of a woman who is sad, who has a hard time connecting with her child, who is weepy, feels hopeless and maybe resentful. This is the picture the media paints about what postpartum depression looks like, and part of the reason why it is so misunderstood.
In reality, postpartum depression and anxiety can manifest itself as irritability, rage, frustration and anger. Which is often directed at your partner, self or even child. These intense feelings of anger can leave you feeling guilty, trapped or worthless as a mom leading to isolation, negative thinking, resentment and possibly suicidal thoughts.
Are you curious about what it looks like? Picture this, your toddler just finished lunch, and you finally got to sit down to feed the baby. And then, your toddler starts complaining that they are hungry. While this would annoy most mothers, considering you JUST fed them lunch, you start feeling angry. Your heart starts beating faster and your blood starts to boil. You can feel your blood pressure rising. Maybe you yell, maybe you aggressively stand up and try to appease your toddler, while dropping F-bombs. Or maybe you just start counting the hours until nap and then bedtime so you can finally be alone and have some quiet. You might think about running away or possibly hurting yourself. And then, when the situation starts to calm down, you feel overwhelmed with guilt. A good mother shouldn’t act this way. A good mother would know how to stay calm. I’ve probably scarred my children for life? The list of worries goes on, and the feelings of guilt grow bigger, creating more depressive and anxious thoughts. You know it’s a problem, but it’s not something that’s really talked about. Well… it should be. This is part of living with postpartum depression and anxiety and it will get better with treatment.
It’s possible that if you’re reading this, you’re looking for how to get help right now. So, I’ve compiled 3 of my favorite tips for calming down anger to get you started.
If you, or someone you love, might be feeling this type of postpartum anger reach out and get help. You can find some resources here and if you think I might be a good fit to help you heal, please call 818-917-6596 or click here to schedule your free consultation today.